


Blue

by LampreyKasuKatsu



Series: Maelstrom inside you [4]
Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-03
Updated: 2017-08-03
Packaged: 2018-12-09 20:38:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11676648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LampreyKasuKatsu/pseuds/LampreyKasuKatsu
Summary: Prequel before Maelstorm inside you: http://archiveofourown.org/series/782934That one time when Sena did not understand.





	Blue

**Author's Note:**

> I am sorry, it's just emotional dump.  
> Bad week, that's all.

There were many sounds belonged to the night; insects humming, neon light buzzing, or the air conditioner's constant, fuzzing noise which border lined annoying. But they were blended to the night beautifully, creating a soft, tranquil atmosphere that lulled everyone who was wrapped underneath it to sleep with no effort.

                A loud crash, cracking laughter, and string of curses that merged into sobs just----didn't fit in.

The illusion of a supposedly peaceful night was cracking down, and all dreams crumbled like thin glass, burned and melted into this one, horrid nightmare.

                He woke up to the sound of a glass breaking, or rather, _someone_ breaking.

Sena was _so_ tired of this shit; it’s not even fucking morning yet, so give him a fucking break he’s pretty sure he _deserved._

Leo just came back today, have been half-assed-ly helping him with all the document that needed to be filled because the guy went missing for _months_ , and if he’s already making a mess in _his_ bathroom Sena sworn he’d fucking-----

                _Oh._

Suddenly, he felt like an asshole.

Leo was sitting on the cold floor with his head buried between his knees, rocking back and forth like he was struggling just to find his balance again. His shoulders shook with each laugh that sounded more like a sob, and pieces of shattered glass were scattered all over the floor.

Hell, Sena was pretty sure he’s _bleeding._

“What the hell just happened in here, Leo-kun? We’ve to go to school tomorrow, and now is so _late----_ “

“It’s alright, Sena. Just go back to sleep”

The way Leo sounded steady and shaken at the same time terrified him. It felt almost like he _knew_ for sure that Sena won’t find out _exactly_ what was wrong, but he was also scared that Sena _wouldn’t_ find out.

_Notice me, but don’t look at me._

Leo was saying that with his bright green eyes locked on the tiled floor, and Sena felt so _useless_ because he _wanted_ to help, but he had no idea how.

                So, he ran, like a coward.

 _Better run away, and do no harm than_ try _to do something, and screwed it up so bad the damage could never be fixed._

“Ok”

Sena hated it, hated this so much, but that was the only word he could get out of his groggy brain right now.

“Good night, see you in the morning”

                He just thought it was a stupid, downright idiotic thing to say, but he honestly did not expect Leo to take that as a sign he didn’t care.

Didn’t expect his _king_ to take that as a sign _no one_ cared.

=================

_This is wrong._

_This is all_ so _wrong._

He should have noticed when everything was starting to went wrong.

(but you didn’t)

He shouldn’t have said that to his face.

(but you did)

===============

“Do you really have to rub all of the things he did wrong into his face?”

One morning after a week of Leo’s comeback, Ritsu said that to him, sounded closest to being fully awake for the first time in forever.

Sena ignored him, though, because Leo didn’t seem to mind it, has never seem to mind anything. So, Sena did it over, and over again.

                _Maybe if I were a little bit meaner, no one would have managed to break him._

“Stupid Ou-sama! Don’t be a stupid composer and change the melody however you want of all the sudden, you’ll just mess it all up, and we’ll have to start over again!”

Leo’s response, or even his reflexive, idiotic laughter, came a little too late as a pure _hurted_ expression passed across his face, and some of its thorns were left in his eyes.

                He tried to mask it, though, with a loud laugh that was too loud to be real.

“Wahahahaha, Even Sena doesn’t love me anymore!”

Leo shouted, but his voice was cracking like every word he said was tearing him apart, like it was molten iron he vomited out of his breaking heart.

“That’s not the point, Stupid Ou-Sama!”

 “What about we take a break, Izumi-chan?”

“….Yeah…I’m so sleepy too…”

                So, they took a break, with Arashi making him wait in the studio, and Ritsu ushering Leo out to another room because _A nice nap would be good for us, Ou-sama._

“You were being totally mean, and a good Onee-chan can’t just stand there and let it happen, right?”

“He has always been fine with that.”

“You know that’s not true, Izumi-chan” Arashi rolled his eyes, “If you’re worried what’s wrong, then ask, don’t _bully_ him.”

                His light blue eyes, suddenly sharp, staring right into his, and he said, “Knights don’t kill their own king. That’s common sense, right?”

==================

Leo would always come to practice; looking so exhausted that it had Ritsu forced him into a five-hour nap which turned to five-minutes one because Ou-sama would popped right up, claiming that they had a lot to do, and it was just his alien hunts talking a toll on him.

                No one bought his lies, though.

“You need more sugar in your system, leader,”

Tsukasa put his favorite candies in Leo’s hand, leaving no room for argument “, and if you come to practice looking this tired again, I’ll make sure you have more, and more candies until you’re as right as rain”

It was Leo’s soft, sincere chuckles that chased the tense atmosphere clouding over their minds away.

“I don’t think candy works that way though, Suou”

                The correctly-pronounced name rolled off his tongue like he has always known how, like he remembered it, like he has never forgotten it.

Sena ignored how _wrong_ that was, and smiled.

=================

Of course Leo didn’t forget. In fact, has _never_ forgotten anything.

If he didn’t hear it, he didn’t hear it. But he did not forget.

                Everything burned into his eyes, every little cruel word dug itself a home inside his head.

Leo smiled so brightly, laugh so loudly, but it was _so_ shallow.

 

                _If I don’t remember, it won’t hurt._

 

He should have listened to his king’s quiet voice, lying beneath the surface of false happiness, so close to the touch if he’d just reach his hands underneath the facade.

                (But you didn’t)

================

                “God, stop”

His numbs fingers kept drawing the same, desperate pattern on Leo’s cheek. A tangible fear clung onto his spine, so terrified that his king would just slip away if he had let him go.

                He won’t, though. He would never watch him crumble again, wouldn’t let him run away again.

Ragged scratches on Ou-sama’s arms were bleeding, they weren’t so deep, but the fact that _no one_ _else_ did that to him made Sena feel sick in the gut.

                He held Leo’s hands away from himself, and hugged him a little bit tighter.

Sena didn’t understand, but he was trying to.

                “I don’t hate you, you know?”

                _I love you._

He loosened his grip on Leo’s hands, and those arms immediately found it way back around his waist.   

                “That’s gonna be a bitch to clean up”

Maybe Sena would be actually pissed off about the blood stains, but suddenly Leo was laughing, and he couldn’t even _pretend_ to be annoyed.

His king had the best laugh, after all.

 

 

 

 

 

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

 


End file.
